Thank you

Tonight I went to The Lucas' house for dinner. I go visit them knowing every time I leave I am a changed person. I love them. They are the best mentors a girl could ask for. They listen. They care. They are wonderful. Their advice or words are not always what I want to hear, but that is why I go back. Some of the truths in my life are hard to face and suppressed and they bring them out even when I feel I am not strong enough to deal with them or I don't have the desire too. At times I leave frustrated for I know I have work to do to get to the person I aspire to be. At times I leave motivated and refreshed. Tonight, I left with some self-actualization. What is important to me? Why do I always feel like I am in a battle with failure? My answers were complex and are not going to be easy to address. But, they opened my eyes to the solution I was overlooking. Christine, don't feel like God is taking away your talents and dreams. I use to think "God's Plan" for me was about the lamest thing imaginable. Why sit in the passenger's seat of your own life? I like control. I figured he would tell me something outlandish to do- Christine, forget your plans of dominating the business world and go be a clown in Thailand. But, the Lucas' brought it to my attention, He gave you these talents to succeed with, not to fail. Following Him and trusting His guidance does not mean you are foregoing your dreams. He will point you in the direction you are suppose to be. My constant agonizing over being unaccomplished or failing is not how God intended me to live. I shouldn't feel ashamed to achieve or afraid to try. His plan for me is there. I am the one that needs the changing.

What I Would Like For Myself Today:

- To get motivated to go to the gym
- To take a nap that lasts 15 hours long
- To find a job
- To have someone itch my head
- To be able to have a warm house
- To have my laundry cleaned
- To not be getting whiter and whiter by the minute for the lack of sun in Oregon

Maybe I have outgrown home?

I decided to come home to my parent's house tonight thinking it would be a nice break from Corvallis. But, as I am here I keep thinking how much this doesn't feel like home anymore. I have outgrown the need to come home.

Thanks to Chris I can laugh at myself whenever I want.

I have a candid camera on me at all times.

Happiness. Joy. Excitement.

It is a pretty exciting time in my life to be experiencing someone else's joy. It almost seems like my own. But, I am glad it isn't. I am glad it is theirs.

I like this article. A little Nostalgia Didn't Hurt Anyone.

CNN.com

This election will change the world
Posted: 1613 GMT

NEW YORK — Finding myself in New York City this U.S. election Day, I saw scenes that reminded me of the first democratic elections I covered in Afghanistan in 2004, or Iraq in 2005.
Voting lines in New York wrapped right around the block.
Voting lines in New York wrapped right around the block.

Scenes that reminded me of the historic election in South Africa in 1994 when a black man, Nelson Mandela, was elected president thus ending generations of white minority rule known as apartheid.

Or 1998 in Iran when women and young people turned out en masse to elect the first ever reform president, the moderate cleric Mohammad Khatami.

The enduring motif from those elections were the massively long lines at the polling centers. Men and women standing patiently, sometimes for hours, to cast their first ever vote for a hopeful secure future.

And that’s what I saw this morning in New York City as the polls opened. As I rode my son to school by bike, we passed a public school-turned voting center that made us gasp.

There were lines wrapped right around the whole block.

People were waiting happily, patiently, with their take-away coffee cups, snapping pictures of each other, recording what they clearly believed was their role in this historic democratic drama.

I asked some whether they had ever stood in line so long to vote here in the U.S. “Never” they said, smiling. TV and radio report similar long queues across the country.

Remember, the U.S. is never known for its high voter turnouts.

Everywhere you look the mood smacks of history…almost a foregone conclusion. Even New York City’s right-wing leading tabloids, are calling it for Obama.

These past few days, people riding in elevators, walking the corridors of their workplace, hopping in cabs or taking care of their kids, have all been discussing their plans for today, election day: Planning not just to cast their own vote, but to help shuttle the elderly, and cajole new young voters to the polls.

Meantime cable and broadcast TV networks can barely contain themselves: Newspaper articles quote news executives all but saying they will be able to call the election as soon as polls close early evening.

No election has electrified the U.S. like this since 1968. But the whole world wishes it could cast a vote in this one. Whatever happens, this U.S. election will change the world. Stay tuned.

*Sigh* of Relief

I feel so refreshed after shopping today!



My car came out of its two week stay at the shop and the first thing I did was hit the mall. Thats officially the longest I had ever been absence from consumerism. Don't judge :) I stocked up on some warm long-sleeve shirts, make-up, a new purple jacket, and lotion. Its amazing how a little use of the debit card can make my whole body happy. Good bye depressing mood caused by this crappy weather... Good bye stress... at least for another week.

*Reading this over made me think I sounded pathetic, but its the truth and I can humiliate myself on my own blog.

Lyrics

Lose your identity, wander in any direction
Yeah, that's the road to heaven's door
Dye your hair suicide blonde
Dye your hair suicide blonde

Another typical Sunday. Wake up at 11:30. Ponder to think of something ambitious to do. Settle for uploading the weekend's pictures. Stay in bed and search for new music. Eat lunch. Do homework. Still in bed. Watch TV online. Finish homework. Wish for something exciting in life. Eat dinner. Feel completely bored. Debate working out. Continue to debate working out. Actually go work out. Shower. Talk on the phone. Go to bed. Sunday's are becoming too routine.

Watch this. It's beautiful. I cried... Yeah, I cried.

It is so well done; touching and classy. I wish I could force every American to watch the whole thing. I want to be a leader like this.

Sick

There is nothing more awful to me than being sick.  All you can do is sit around and feel terrible.  I hate being sick! 

VH1 Celeb Reality

Celeb Rehab!

Oh thank you Dr. Drew for bringing more celebrities together to show how crazy the road to recovery is.  This season should be great now that Gary Busey is participating.  I can't wait until the day where I am so bored that all I will do is watch marathons of withdrawing coke heads yelling and screaming each other! 

The Pickup Artist 2

I am new to this program, but after watching the first two episodes it is pretty entertaining to watch socially awkward guys trying to talk to girls.  

I <3 The Weepies

I am so thankful I got introduced to The Weepies. I love their music. My favorite songs from their three albums are (in no specific order):

Take It From Me- Say I Am You
Gotta Have You- Say I Am You
Nobody Knows Me at All- Say I Am You

Somebody Loved- Happiness

Hideaway- Hideaway
Orbiting- Hideaway
Takes So Long- Hideaway

What's sad is I could probably write down all the songs from their three albums (minus one that comes to mind), because I love them so much.

Restless

Restless

: A state of emotional agitation

: With music

: With life

: Without you

Apathy

: Absence of emotion or enthusiasm

: With music

: With life

: Without you

Currently listening to: Nobody Knows me at All by The Weepies

I miss you

It really is my day of rest

I don't exactly have anything I want to talk about. But, it has been my typical Sunday. I finally got out of bed at 12:30 to go to the bathroom to then hop back into bed until 1:00. I did have some good music listening sessions thanks to Chris and the music he dumped into my iTunes. I watched some mindless television on my computer. Then I watched k9 cops attack criminals on Animal Planet with my roommates. Curled back in bed to write a paper later and then wandered off to the gym. Once I got home to some new cupcakes on the counter I demolished any progress I made at the gym with some halloween decorated yummy goodness. I caught up on my weekly dose of Post Secret and now I find myself bored and not willing to continue on my domestic drilling policy paper. So, I think I will continue to do nothing to complete my nothingness of a day. I love Sundays.

Currently Listening to: Empire State by Guster

For the Bible Tells Me So

Forthebibletellsmeso.org

I watched this movie in class today. Not only was it one of the most thought-provoking films I have seen, it really called me to question my thoughts on homosexuality and religion. Religion in America and homosexuality are both topics I like learning about. They are equally very controversial to our society.

In the hour and twenty minutes that this movie ran, I managed to scribble down a page of notes I thought to be interesting. Most of my thoughts are not fully investigated, but maybe I can piece them together enough to get you to watch the film.

- Prejudice was born in the church. The church is an institution where people of power (white males) have used the Bible as a source of oppression to "other" groups. Other groups in the past have been African-Americans and women. Now the "other" group is homosexuals.

- Hatred of homosexuals could also stem from the long belief that women are inferior to males. Typically it is generalized that men are more feminine if they are gay and their masculinity is lost. Feminine men are thought of as a bad thing in our culture. Lately this has not been looked upon as so bad, but in the past gay men were stereotyped as acting transsexual.

- The Bible has been taken too literally on its stance on homosexuality. Right-winged Christians claim the Bible addressed the issue of homosexuality 6-7 times. Now, I am not a Bible expert, but from what I have read of these 6-7 passages doesn't blatantly discuss homosexuality at all. Sodom and Gamorrah has so many ambiquities and translations that it would be jumping to conclusions to think it was about punishing homosexuality.

- In the Bible there is a theme of take what you have and give it to the poor. Obviously, people don't take this passage too literally, so why do they exploit the more ambiguous ones to subordinate gays/lesbians/bisexuals/transgendered?


- Bible literalists are typically capitalists who use there conservative believes to make money off the Bible (politicians).

- Humans are not the only species who have homosexuals. Lions, sheep, zebras, among thousands of other animals have same sex relationships.


- The oppression of homosexuals has caused suicide rates to be three to seven times higher than that of heterosexual individuals. This rate continues to climb. Every five hours one homosexual successfully commits suicide.

- Bible literalists claim being a homosexual results in "abomination." Eating shrimp, having two seeds in one hole, working on sabbath, wearing linen and wool simultaineously also causes "abomination." Would people be criticized, terrorized, and feared for doing any of these other acts?

- When people say "This is what the Bible says," respond back, "No, that is what the Bible reads." There is a big difference.

I might develop this idea later. In the meantime, be bewildered with me.

I am going to stop believing in cliches. I am finding most of them are coming true and I am not one who likes to have predetermined advice. But then like most cliches, that cliche is untrue.

The worst part about Oregon winters

I despise the rain. I can't bear the cold. I don't like feeling numb. I can't stand when my hands turn purple. I get annoyed when I have goosebumps. But, the thing I hate the most about Oregon winters is when my jeans are wet at the bottom.